Top O’ the Briefing
Happy Thursday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. (In preparation for a whirlwind book tour, the Sine Qua Non Sequitur is earning an advanced certificate in Whiskey-Inspired Lederhosen Design.)
President Trump has Greenland fever and, I’m not gonna lie, I think it’s contagious. It is for me, anyway. I have been intrigued and amused by Trump’s interest in Greenland since he first started talking about it during his first term. After he was reelected in 2024, he didn’t take long to once again mention his interest in it. I wrote on Christmas Eve that year that Greenland seemed like a wonderful stocking stuffer.
Many of my colleagues are writing serious, thoughtful pieces about the president’s pursuit of Greenland. I’m having fun with it for a couple of reasons. The main one is that Greenland is too far away for the Service Employees International Union (SEIU) to organize and deploy leftist rage mobs. Trust me, SEIU is behind a lot of “grassroots” lefty protests. Anyway, Greenland proper is relatively freak show free right now. Focusing on Greenland is a great palate cleanser for the Minneapolis fatigue I’m currently experiencing.
For the moment, the Greenland dream is alive. This is from Chris:
President Donald Trump announced on Truth Social on Wednesday afternoon that he and NATO Secretary General Mark Rutte have reached a deal on the future of Greenland.
As Chris notes, Trump’s post was short on details. It said that he and Rutte had put together “the framework of a future deal with respect to Greenland and, in fact, the entire Arctic Region.” That could mean any number of things. I would think that if a purchase of Greenland by the United States were in the offing, Trump would be crowing about it. It’s highly possible that his talk of buying Greenland or acquiring it through military means were simply Trumpian negotiation tactics. He did literally write the book on that kind of thing, after all.
Until I learn otherwise, I’m going to continue to hope that this ends up being Trump’s Louisiana Purchase. The tizzy on the left would be delicious if Trump added a monumental real estate deal to his list of presidential accomplishments.
A purchase of Greenland would be legitimate, of course, but Dems don’t know that because they don’t read real history books. They’re not aware of how a lot of this continent became part of the United States. I live in a city that was part of the Gadsden Purchase of 1854. As far as I know, there were no radical loons back then who were bent out of shape because President Franklin Pierce made a land deal.
I wrote yesterday that it’s always a blast to watch the delicate lefties being triggered by President Trump’s Greenland overtures. I also somewhat jokingly said that I would like to be the territorial governor of Greenland should we end up with it. I feel that “territorial governor” is a bit bland, so I played around with some variations. Here’s one example:
My agenda as Lord Majestic Governor of Greenland would be simple: facilitate the beefing up of American security and make sure that all visiting icky Eurotrash types do a lot of sucking up. They’ll be in barracks-style housing at first, then moved to the Greenland Motel 6 after sufficiently showing appreciation for all things American.
What’s not to like about that? I’m a brilliant blend of patriotic resolve and curmudgeonliness, and I think it’s time to put that combo to good use.
For America.
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