Happy Friday, Gentle Readers,
I pray this missive finds you well. I was planning on this being a productive weekend in terms of yard work and spring refurbishing, but despite what the calendar says, winter refuses to give up its icy grip on the Beehive State. We have had so much precipitation this spring that the yard has to be mowed. I may be one of the few people in history to cut his lawn under the threat of an incoming hailstorm. Not to mention, I have four Barred Rock chicks currently living in the garage under a heat lamp that are almost ready to be moved into the pen. They could at least give the truck an oil change while they are out there.
Stunning… Brave… Obnoxious
I have never been to Whole Foods. The primary reason for this is that the closest one is about 45 minutes away. Also, Whole Foods is one of the grocery stores of choice for wealthy progressives, and your humble correspondent is neither wealthy nor progressive.
I do occasionally wander into a Trader Joe’s, which offers some high-end comestibles that we can sometimes afford, a few decent craft beers, and “Scandinavian Swimmers,” which is a knock-off of Swedish Fish, repackaged to avoid a copyright lawsuit. But Whole Foods? Never graced the gates. I’m relatively sure that if I even tried walking through the doors, I would trigger some sort of alarm system, be placed in ethically sourced stocks repurposed from parts of an old lumber mill, and be fed a diet of fair-trade gruel.
It turns out that Lefties are still frequenting Whole Foods, but they are not being entirely above-board with their purchases. Because they are irked at Jeff Bezos for floating the idea that the WaPo could be more than a birdcage liner that occasionally moonlights as a leftist propaganda outlet, well-heeled progressives have taken to ripping off Whole Foods as an act of rebellion.
Oh, and they are still mad about Bezos meeting with Trump. It is also because affluent and upper-middle-class progressives are easily bored and easily entertained by channeling their inner activist. In this case, when they compare themselves to Bezos, they suddenly identify as “poor.” No, really.
From American Wire:
“If a billionaire can steal from me, I can scrape a little off the top, too,” a man referred to as Lee expressed as he described his actions at the supermarket owned by founder and executive chairman Bezos’ Amazon.
Calling his actions “grand theft auto-ing,” Lee admitted to pocketing items, entering incorrect amounts at self-checkout, and manipulating the scale at the hot bar to cheat the system.
You’re a regular Captain Jack Sparrow, Lee. Then there is Jesse:
Similarly, a man under the pseudonym Jesse, described as “a 30-something tech worker,” confessed to stealing bags of groceries from Whole Foods that included steaks. “I never felt bad for the corporation as a whole, because it was Amazon and, you know, it was Jeff Bezos. He just profits so much taking advantage of the little people, so if we as little people can bite back a little bit, and that’s me taking $100 maybe out of revenue for him, that’s a little bit of a middle finger.”
That’s very… gangsta of you, Jesse. Say, when you are with your crew, do you pour out a little double latte for your dead homies?
Normally, this is where I would come up with a snarky punchline. I’ll close by saying to Jesse, Lee, and all the other Left-Wing, thrill-seeking desperados living on the edge: this is why people voted for Trump, you overindulged narcissistic nincompoops. The truth is, we didn’t love Trump so much as we were sick of people like you.
Wine recommendation
Because I didn’t steal this bottle from Whole Foods, unlike some people I could mention.
This time around, let me introduce you to the 2022 Bodega Hinojosa Malbec.
This Argentinian offering retails for right around $11 to $15, give or take. The wine comes from the Valle de Uco, a province of Mendoza. That region has become known in the past few years for producing high-quality Malbecs. This high-altitude wine has very good color and a nice, dusky bouquet with hints of leather, wood, and smoke. It plays it pretty much down the middle in terms of tannins, dryness, and smoothness, making for a very easy, drinkable glass. Look for some plum, a bit of strawberry, a little chocolate, and a decent amount of spiciness. You might catch a little bit of vanilla in there.
You can match this wine with the usual red meats, but since it is almost grilling season, you might try to pair it up with barbecued pork.
That’s it for me. Have a great weekend, and I’ll see you next time.
That was the wind-up; here’s the pitch. We know there are a lot of demands on your money right now, and things seem a little iffy financially. That said, becoming a VIP member at PJ Media is an excellent investment of your time and money. You enjoy access to comments, messaging, our media products, and our groovy merch store—all for a very reasonable price. And as a bonus, you’ll help us keep an eye on all the developments at home and abroad. If you join right now, you can save 60% using the promo code FIGHT. Just click here, and you’ll be all set before you know it.
